Frogs' Legs Aren't Funny

The download of my daily (almost) thoughts and ruminations.

Monday, March 31, 2008

April Fool's Eve

Yet again I'm a failure. Here it is, the night before the most important holiday in the year and I'm not prepared with any cool tricks up my sleeve. My staff all look forward to the morning of April Fool's Day with trepidation and here I am letting them down. All I can think of to do it to call some of them to let them know they need to talk to one of the other staff first thing tomorrow about some bogus thing. That doesn't seem very special but obviously I'm seriously running out of time. The problem is, I've done so many pranks in the past, there is nothing I can do on this particular date that doesn't make the staff suspicious.

You know, Antiques Roadshow makes you want to keep everything you ever had. It never ceases to amaze me how much value people place on old junk. Although, I'm looking now at a photograph of Abraham Lincoln, autographed by him and two letters he wrote to a general during the Civil War, not junk by a long shot. The total value of these three items is about $75,000 - $100,000. It's amazing what gets passed down within families and generation after generation doesn't have a clue as to the value of said bequeathed items.

Isn't it interesting how people make the career choices they do? I'm reading a book right now about a guy during the depression whose parents were killed in a car accident while he was a senior at Cornell University, majoring in veterinarian medicine. Come to find out, they had taken out a mortgage to pay for his education and the house and everything in it now belonged to the bank meaning he had absolutely nothing.

With no relatives, money or worldly possessions left whatsoever, he bumbled around and ended up on a train with numerous other homeless types. One of these guys took him under his wing and pointed him toward a circus. They found out about his major and he immediately became the menagerie's vet; hence, the title "Water For Elephants". It reminds me alot of the HBO show, "Carnivale" with many of the same types of characters/performers. They were really big on freaks for audiences to stare at back then. That as well as a minor obsession with prohibition, or rather with the constant pursuit of booze wherever they could get it. Kind of like some others I know only their obsession is much more recent.

Wednesday, March 26, 2008

e*

Since the web was introduced, we have seen a proliferation of eterms. This has occurred beyond reasonableness, to the point where this has become an alternative universe, practically anyway. There truly does seem to be some level of infinity involved, a world without end, minus the amen.

It all started with email, which actually predated the internet. Through your email you have the option to send eGreetiings or to purchase something you can't live without from ebay or dump your former partner for a new one on eHarmony or update your iPod with eMusic or determine the necessary treatment for your bug on eMedicine or set up a pen pal (so to speak) on ePals or virtually learn about wildlife through eNature (why would you want to go outside and see it for real after all) or get caught up on your computer news on eWeek or figure out how to finally fix the carburetor in your car on eHow or buy the car needing the new carburetor with an application on eLoan or send a document to someone who doesn't have email through eFax or avoid the line at the post office on April 15th by using eFile with the IRS or buy some really cheap stock on eTrade or learn something new each day through eLibrary or refer your recent college grad friend to eArchitect to find a job opportunity or learn the difference between a kangaroo and a human skeleton on eSkeletons or read what's happening in the business world of India in eJournals or locate a ham radio operator around the world on eHam (why you wouldn't do this on your radio I don't know) or learn how to be better at most anything with an eTutor or apply for an unclaimed pot of money through eGrants or tell the British prime minister all about your woes on ePetitions or find the most obscure book you can on eBooks or lastly take a virtual (and much cheaper and more healthy) vacation on eMexico.



Ten or fifteen years ago, people would have looked cross-eyed at me if I had used just one of these terms. Now, the use of "e" before a word has become so commonplace no one even blinks when they hear it.

Well enough about that, it's time for me to take an eBreak.

Tuesday, March 25, 2008

Gene Shalit, Roger Ebert or Me?

I am amazed to report that I have watched about 79 movies since joining Netflix just over a year ago. I credit this number mostly to the two months time I was home recuperating after my surgery earlier this year. At that point, I wished I could get instant replacements instead of having to wait a few days so added a third to our mix, not that it made much difference.

Anyway, following is a brief list under particular categories indicating those that impacted or impressed me most (you'll notice I didn't necessarily say I always enjoyed them the most).

Environmental
  • Who Killed the Electric Car?
  • An Inconvenient Truth
Foreign


The Chorus







  • My Father's Glory (1)
  • My Mother's Castle (2)
  • Cinema Paradiso
  • Children of Heaven
  • Dear Frankie
  • The Advocate
  • Water
  • Once
  • The Wind That Shakes the Barley
  • Greenfingers
  • Conspiracy
  • Saint Ralph
  • The Secret of Roan Inish
  • This Is England
  • Goya's Ghosts
  • Tsotsi
  • Hope and Glory
Independent or HBO
  • The Simple Life of Noah Dearborn
  • Little Miss Sunshine
  • Garden State
  • Something the Lord Made
Classics

The Bridge on the River Kwai





  • Life With Father
  • The Manchurian Candidate (original)
  • The Guns of Navarone
  • The Nun's Story
  • The Heiress
  • Alice Adams
  • Sullivan's Travels
  • Heaven Knows, Mr. Allison
Regular Cinema
  • The Legend of Bagger Vance
  • The Jane Austen Book Club
  • Becoming Jane
  • The Lake House
  • Memoirs of a Geisha
Some of these aren't the best movies you'll ever see but there's a good assortment here to appeal to most movie genres. Each of them is interesting or different at a minimum. Enjoy!

Sunday, March 23, 2008

Who Do You Believe?

After watching "An Inconvenient Truth", I can't stop thinking about our beach house on the Long Beach, Washington peninsula. According to the film, and to the scientists who did the research used by the film, once the ice of Greenland melts (and it's not a matter of if but of when), the oceans around the world will raise 20 feet. Well, there is only one place on the peninsula that is taller than that and it's not under our house.

This seems like such a deadly gamble to sit and wait for this event to occur because there will be no warning, or at least not enough to evacuate the single lane highway of all the peninsula's inhabitants at that time. Even if none of the family is there, we would still have missed any opportunity to sell the property prior to it being underwater.

Now, you could say for me to even think this way is somewhat unethical but my entire life has been about missing opportunities and this house all of a sudden being underwater would be another missed opportunity. Not only that, who is going to feel safe going to the peninsula once more press begins to cover this inevitable phenomenon?

I guess the real question is, will the rise in water level occur gradually over hundreds of years or suddenly within hours or at the most, days? Just talking about this makes me feel like a dinosaur just counting my hours.

Al Gore made the point throughout the film that we could still stop or at least slow down global warming if we would just quickly join together to take the necessary measures. But I don't see anybody joining to change or stop any of our environmentally destructive activities, do you?

Saturday, March 22, 2008

Vacant But Not Forgotten

Have you ever had so much buzzing around in your head that it seemed as good as empty? That's me lately. I've always wondered how the genius types are able to cram so much into their heads to the point they have what appears to be total recall. Not only that, they continue to read and learn throughout their lives, it never stops. So where do they put it all? Perhaps there are little triggers in my brain that never got turned on, empty spaces that never filled in? I don't know what else to think.

There are times when I'm talking and the word I need to complete the sentence is simply gone. No matter how hard I concentrate, there is nothing but blank space for a brain. It's not just disconcerting, it's embarrassing. And nothing I try to do seems to improve the "condition". I heard at one point that the asthma medicine I used to take for years wipes out memory, I don't know if that's true but even though I quit taking that medicine at least 15 years ago, I still have any number of black holes in my brain.

We will watch movies three or four times a week and most of the time I forget which ones I've seen. The same is true of books I'm reading, it's the book two books back I don't remember. I remember taking a class when I was in my 20's called effective listening that taught you how to remember multitudes of things. It was actually more memorization but it did help to remember with gimmicks. Of course now I can't even remember the gimmicks.

Some say it's because you're so busy that you're brain can only hold so much but aren't geniuses busy too? I keep hoping my memory will return but of course who could remember if it did?

P. S. OK, so Robin Williams isn't a complete genius but his comedy certainly is.

Wednesday, March 12, 2008

A Little Bit

Have you noticed how just a little bit of something can make all the difference? A little bit of color when we're heading from Winter into Spring. A little bit of food when you're really hungry. A little bit of candy when your sweet tooth hits. A little bit of most tv can go a long way.

A little bit of Colin Firth can be very satisfying. A little bit of money can do so much for those less fortunate. A little bit of talent can provide opportunities you wouldn't have had otherwise. A little bit of humor can really lighten your day. A little bit of compassion can help someone through a hard time. A little bit of reading can teach you something you never knew before. A little bit of weight can mean your clothes won't fit. A little bit of exercise can reverse that problem. A little bit of travel can permanently implant the bug. A little bit of time with friends is something to treasure. A little bit of Las Vegas can be overwhelming.

A little bit of rock and roll makes everything right. A little bit of news can be very depressing. A little bit of retirement can be addictive (of course, so can drugs). A little bit of daydreaming can reset your brain. A little bit of work is sufficient or even too much. While a little bit of shopping is never enough. A little bit of sisters is very special. A little bit of daughters is the best. A little bit of a baby boy can absolutely make your day and brighten your entire life. And my life is more than a little bit wonderful.

Tuesday, March 11, 2008

No Big Surprise

You can tell I'm back to work since I'm down to only posting once a week. Oh well, better than not at all. And things are a little tense around work since I got back. It's interesting because I can't tell what exactly is behind it so I'm laying low, trying to figure it out. I think the time is coming very soon when I'll have to jump into the midst of the fray but I'm trying to hold onto my relaxed frame of mind as long as possible.

Am I correct, or might this have been a day when there was no natural disaster, no horrible crime committed by deranged humans against their fellow humans, no major environmental faux pas, no significant layoffs, no deadly disease spread, no political mud slung, etc? How refreshing! And if I'm wrong, just don't tell me.

Well, the Selma, Oregon AI contestant is going to be short for this world I'm afraid. She actually tried to countrify "8 Days A Week" and it really, really didn't work. Sometimes I wonder if these kids can hear themselves or maybe their friends are simply telling them what they want to hear. Either way, there is some very good and some very bad decision making going on and she fell into the latter.

I can't believe I even know this...

Wednesday, March 05, 2008

Roller Coaster

ObamaClintonObamaClintonObamaClintonObamaClintonObamaClintonObamaClintonObamaClinton
I feel like we are watching a movie that is taking forever to expose the plot/hero/heroine. If they aren't careful, we are all going to get bored and turn the channel.

It isn't that I'm not excited that we have both a woman and a black man competing for the highest position in the land, I am. I'm just tired of the same rehashed news everyday.

I guess I need to take a break...

Monday, March 03, 2008

What I Know Now

Today was my first day back at work after almost two months. So, what did I learn about staying at home for that period of time besides the fact that two months is a long time when you can't drive?

- I have lovely family and friends who supported me throughout
- If I don't exercise consistently, I gain weight
- Too much caffeine is not a good thing
- eBay is a great place to pick up unusual items like Disney lithographs and it's so easy
- If you have to keep your hand higher than your heart and iced, you can't exercise
- If the wrong, fattening food is sitting here, and I'm bored, I'll eat it and I gain weight
- If I have nothing else to do I'll cycle through tv, a book and/or a NetFlix movie
- I really don't like to go out with no make-up and blah hair, but if enough time goes by, I'll do it anyway
- My husband is a much better cook than I am, which contributed to my weight
- My cat loves having me home at first but she gets over it after a few weeks
- I hate soap operas and most daytime commercials more than ever
- There are 10 weight loss commercials to every commercial for fattening food
- I think Martha Stewart could probably make a hybrid car out of flowers or craft paper
- I think some of the designers on TLC should be fired
- Local newscasters report the same news again and again each day until they must be gagging with it
- You can't get too many bouquets of flowers
- You can't get too many "Get Well" cards
- There are more places to eat lunch on the east side than I will ever have time to use
- Never judge a shop by its front
- It's harder to be the one waiting than it is to be the one who is coming home


The overall lesson for me is that I will need to keep myself very busy when I retire. No sitting around the house for me.

Saturday, March 01, 2008

Time To Turn Down The Sound?

Politics are turning nasty, this is about the time I hit the mute button, every time one of the candidates jumps onto the screen. You can easily anticipate the subject "du jour", it will either be:
  • Iraq (a downer in any sentence), health care for the world,
  • saving the earth (just one gas/oil burning car at a time),
  • the economy (the only way it goes anymore is down and paying people a few hundred bucks isn't going to do squat),
  • anti-terrorism (when have we not had this problem),
  • immigration (aren't we a nation of nothing but immigrants, excluding the Native Americans who truly belong here and were here long before Chris or Amerigo arrived),

  • stem cell research (why are people so afraid of science),
  • NAFTA (what does that stand for again, oh yea, sending work out of the country because that helps us keep prices down),
  • the sad state of education (we are quickly arriving at statistics where more students drop out than finish and obtain their diplomas)
And now, CNN is already predicting who the smart picks would be for the Vice President spot. Their decisionmaking feels something like being on a teeter-totter. It's interesting how they never have sufficient real news, they need to create potential news on top of that.

Speaking of news, I thought it was interesting that Queen Elizabeth felt it was not necessarily dangerous to put Prince Harry on the front lines in Afghanistan until the media caught wind of it. The news no sooner leaked out then he was shipped home, escorted by his daddy and brother. So apparently the media is more dangerous than the Afghan rebels? I wonder if this ever would have happened if Diana had still been a force.

OK, time to turn off the tv.