WAITING

Have you ever noticed how much more preferable it is to be the one traveling instead of the one back home waiting to hear from the one traveling? So you say, big duh! Right, but I do have the answer to this dilemma. All you have to do is make sure you accompany everyone you know on their trips, that is of course on top of those that you plan. You could become something of a professional traveler. So what issues might there be with this approach...hmmm, let me think:

• money could be an issue I suppose
• you'd undoubtedly be in a "If it's Tuesday it must be Belgium" mode
• it could be impossible for your birthday and/or Christmas gifts to ever reach you (if they were clothes they may not fit you or be in style by the time you do get them)
• your pets would miss you...then they'd disown you
  
• your creditors would miss you...then they'd repossess everything you own
• your family would miss you and send you nagging letters to come home
  
• everything in your refrigerator would turn varying shades of blue (your house would eventually have to be designated a hazardous waste area)
• you would eventually become sleep-deprived
  
• your voter's card would expire (oh no, you couldn't vote against Bush, wait a minute - he's done!)
• no more trick-or-treating
• and finally, what if they travel to the armpit of the world, are you going to follow?

I'm sure there are other important things that would occur, these were just top-of-mind. This was enough to change my mind before I even made it up. What's funny is I don't know which of these issues would be more bothersome; well, to each his own.

Isn't it bizarre how some people are simply in the wrong place at the wrong time? So who comes to mind when I say this:

1. Sitting in your living room when a car drives through it
2. Getting hit by lightening while playing golf
3. Scuba diving in a cave and running headlong into a shark
4. Hiking on a mountain on what starts out to be a sunny day and all of a sudden there's a whiteout
5. Being in an elevator when the power goes off
6. Passing the last exit on the freeway only to be immediately faced with miles and miles of traffic that's completely stopped
7. Crossing an otherwise inconsequential stream when a flash flood appears
8. Visiting relatives in the midwest when a tornado suddenly hits
9. Losing your job immediately after buying a new car
10. Getting pregnant only after starting the "pill".
    

Isn't life funny?